i know everyone is thinking about one thing: did i send a letter to Steven? well i wont lie... its true. but listen up. i have an explanation.
i was upset to see that my darling saphire was hurt. i was mad and upset to see her hurt. and because of that little want for revenge, i went into this rage that i cant get out of easily. this is natural: when you see your loved ones hurt, you want revenge. its a fact of life. but i went too far.
last week, i wrote a letter to Steven about how if he doesn't admit what he has done, he would suffer the consequences. but it was a hollow threat, something that i wouldn't make up for. i should have torn it up, but i didn't and gotten myself in this shit that i cant get out of... if Steven haven't of blocked me for cursing, he would have told me his side of the story and helped us become friends again.
but like the moody and spoiled boy that i am, i sent it, hoping that he'll tell everyone the truth. but since i couldn't see him, i was a little off on the messaging... i lament myself for this stuff, i really do.
this is my atonement. i really didn't want this to happen. i didn't know better... but please...forgive me for my actions...i didn't want this to happen. but it did happen... and i deeply hate/crush/100%-want-to-shoot-myself-in-the-foot and i feel just downright shitty....
i don't expect a forgiveness from Steven, and frankly, from the way I've been acting, i don't blame him. but i deeply regret my decision and i hope it'll blow over.